QUOTES

House quotes
Wilson: That smugness of yours really is an attractive quality
House: Why thank you, it was either that or get my hair highlighted. Smugness is easier to maintain.

House: Minimal at best? is that the stiff British upper lip way of saying 'No chance in hell'?
Chase: I'm Australian
House: You put the queen on your money, you're British

House: Fine! I'll never do it again
Foreman: Yes you will!
House: Which proves that this argument is pointless!

Foreman: So when you say 'call me if you need anything' you're really saying 'don't call me'?
House: No, I mean call me if I can do something. I'm bad at search parties and I'm bad at looking nervous doing nothing.

House: That doesn't sound like me...
Wilson: Actually it does, but it doesn't mean you're guilty
House: You think?

Foreman: You want to bet on a patient's health?
House: Do you think that's bad luck? You think God will smite him because of our insensitivity? Well, if God does, you'd make a quick fifty

Wilson: Do you have a thing for her?
House: No, there is not a thin line between love and hate, there is, in fact, a wall of china with armed centuries posted every twenty feet between love and hate

House: Make a note, I should never doubt myself
Wilson: I think you'll remember

Foreman: It's not paranoia if someone IS out to get you

House: Your wife is having an affair
Patient: What??
House: You're orange, you moron! It's one thing for you not to notice, but your wife hasn't picked up on the fact that her husband has changed colors. She's just not paying attention. Oh, by the way, do you consume just ridiculous amounts of carrots and mega-dose vitamins? The carrots turn you yellow the niacin turns you red. Get a set of finger paints and figure it out

Cameron: It's hard to work for a guy who doesn't respect me
House: Why?
Cameron: Was that rhetorical?
House: No. Just seems like that way because you can't think of an answer

Cameron: What about sex?
House: Well, it could get complicated. We work together, I'm older but if you go for that kind of thing...
Cameron: I meant syphilis
House: Nice cover

House: Who cares about McPhearson? I heard he tortures kittens
Foreman: McDonald
House: Oh, McDonald. Wonderful doctor, loves kittens

House: I also recognize that I am human and capable of error
Wilson: Do you might have screwed this up?
House: No
Wilson: so, it's merly a theoretical capacity for error?
House: Good point. Maybe there isn't one. Maybe that's my error